kung ako ba mamamatay, madameng makikiramaay?, haay yan ang tanong na madalas tumakbo sa utak q ngayon, haay sana hindi ganito sana hindi ganyan, kainis ayaw q na!, nahihirapan na aq e, malungkot masaya magulo tahimik malabo, ayan aq nitong mga nakaraang araw, hindi alam ang ggawin, nguguluhan nalilito, haay ulit, nonsense ang blog na ito, gusto q lng mglabas ng sama ng loob at ng saloobin, ayan malabo, huhu magulo ang buhay q ngayon, pero kahit magulo, maayos nmn ang pag aaral q, hndi aq nkkalimot mag aral e, the sad part is, nkkalimutan q na ata magdasal, sobra! nhhiya na nga aq minsan tumawag sknya xe parang feeling q, ttawag aq sknya pag may kailangan lng, makulit! nkkairita na, haay

Hindi malaman kung ano ang gagawin
Sa damdamin na di ko maamin
Sa sarili, kung bakit ka pa ba nandyan oohhh...
Sabi sabi ng mga kaibigan ko
Wag mong pilitin ang hindi para sa'yo
Ngunit bakit hindi kita makalimutan
Sa'yo ba'y ok lang

Habang tumatagal lumala lalong nagwawala
Tumitindi, umiinit, sumasakit ang dibdib
Kaya't ako'y gumawa ng awiting ito
Na alay ko sa'yo
Sana'y pakinggan mo oohhh...

Huwag ka sana magugulat sa akin
Di ako sanay sa ganitong suliranin
Wag kang matakot hindi ako manloloko
Kung ok lang sa'yo

Ngayong alam mo na sana'y di ka maiinis
At pasensya na kung ako ay makulit
Pero kung gusto mo ako nalang ang lalayo
Kung ok lang sa'yo

Damn!!, sana ok lang tlga syo!, huhu

is this the end of it?, hndi q na alam kung tama pa ang nga gngawa q e, hndi na aq productive na chapter head tapos nagaasam pa ng cluster?, hndi na nga maitaguyod ang naghihingalong chapter e, panu pa kaya ang cluster?, mas maigi cgurong umalis na lng at hndi na mgpakita, para nmn sa ganun ay wala na aq maabalang mga tao, un nga lang, wala pa din aq nkkitang kapalit q as chapter head, may nkausap aqng taong malapit sa puso q, wag daw aq umalis, madame daw ngmamahal sken at magcmula ulit aqng mgtaguyod ng chapter, pero potek!!, sobrang hirap, sarili q sa ngayon hndi q maayos, pano pa kya ung chapter?, ganun ba tlga un?, ayaw q mgpalamon sa inggit at inis, pero un nga, wala aq mgawa, mali man ang pag alis, cguro un na nga lng din ang ggawin q, hndi q pa din nkausap ng maayos ung head q about this, pero un nga, mas lamang tlaga sken ang pag alis ngayon, paxenxa na,


umiiyak aq habang cnusulat q to, ganun q kamahal ang yfc e, pati ang magulang q inaway q na para lng ipagtanggol ito, pero, nkkasawa din pala, at conflict na din minsan sa school e, ang dami na kalaban, hndi q na alam kung alin ang uunahin q, waah

haay buhay nga nmn, nkkamiss pala ung taong malapit sa puso mo kapag hndi na kyo maxado ngkakausap, huhu  hndi q alam kung bket gn2 ang nararamdaman q e, pero isa lang ang alam q, miss q xa at    gs2 q xa makita, ngkita pala kme nung tues at wed, pero kulang pa q, gs2 q pa xa makasama ng matagal,bitin e, mabilis xe ang byahe sa LRT, kya un, kung mayaman lng talaga aq, nakow!!, hndi q xa mamimiss ng gn2 e, e2 pa, sobrang busy na nya ngayon, kaya wala na tlga xa time mkpgusap, naiintindihan q nmn xa, mahirap tlga kalaban ang school e, haay miss q na tlaga xa, sana mkgawa aq ng paraan para magkita kme, may naisip aq kaso nga lng wala tlga aq budget, gs2 q sana ng dinner sa labas o kahit lunch lng, pero gets??, sa sarili q nga wala na aq pang gas2s, dun pa kaya, haay tlga, sana tumama aq sa lotto para may pera na aq, haha mahirap xe xa taptan, sobrang nanliliit aq saknya, kya un, miss q lng xa, wala na aq gs2ng iba sa ngayon kundi ang makita at makasama xa, haay
ang corny q na noh?, ganun tlga e, paxenxa na mga kapatid, hndi q lng mapigilan e,

may isang ngsabi sken na "gs2 mu bang madagdagan na nmn ang koleksyon mu?" ang ibig sabihin ay madagdagan ang nambasted sken, e wala na aq pakielam, bsta nkakausap q xa at nakikita ok na un, madame na ang pumipigil, hndi lng tlga mapigilan, haay


MISS NA KITA!!!! WAAAHH

nkkainis lng, biruin mu, antagal q na ngppraktis para lng sa wala, haay sa isang bwang praktis, 2 times lng aq umabsent with reasonable excuses, tapos gn2 pa, hindi q maintindihan kung bket wla xa konsidrasyon P**A!!! tama bang kunin nya ang uniform q para hindi mkpglaro at hindi mgpakita sa unang game nmen kung kelan xa kailangan, ang labo nmn atang coach nun ah, bwiset xa, parang gusto nya xa na lng ang laging tama, hindi nmn ata pwede un, aba tao kme at hindi hayop noh!!, kung ayaw nya aq mglaro edi huwag, madali nmn aq kausap at pabor sken un xe hindi na aq maxado mppagod sa school at mkkpgconcntrate na aq sa pag aaral, hindi nmn aq ang nawalan e, potek!!!

haay ang buhay tambay nga nmn, nagssawa na din aq maging tambay, namimiss q na ang pagaaral as in!, promise! nkkasawa na ang paulit ulit na routine q d2 sa bahay, lagi na lang gising ng tanghali, tapos kain ng lunch, tapos mga 1:30 2log ulit, gcng ng mga 6 o 7 pm, kain ng dinner tapos tambay na sa labas, nkkasawa din pala, akala q masay, haay wala pa aq trabaho!, waaaahhh

what the heck!, haha d2 na nmn aq, wala lang, grabe talaga, nainis na aq, lagi nlng pinipilit ng mga magulang q ung ayaw q, haay sbagay, they just want what's best for me, pero ayaw q talaga, sana maintindihan nila, at eto pa, cguro 4 consecutive days, i'm drunk, natigil ng 2 days, tapos eto na nmn, haha wala na xe aq nagawa sa buhay q ee, hekhek xe nmn, ung mga tropa q, puro lablayp, aq ngkaron pero nawala din agad, ewan q kung bket, bsta 2 days na xa hindi ngpaparamdam, haay ulit, pero meron xe aq npanaginipan, haha matagal q na crush un hindi q lang pwede aminin sknya xe we are friends, at hindi lang basta friends, lagi aq sknya humuihingi ng 2long and everything, madame na din xa alam 2ngol sken, kya nga lang, as in totally hindi q talaga xa pwede ligawan or hindi q talaga pwede sbihin sknya na crush q xa, nahirap na e, iwas pusoy lang aq, basta, sa mga nkka alm, kilala nyo na kung cnu ung tinutukoy q, si ROSE na nga un, haha alam nyo nmn kung baket hindi q pwede sbihin sknya dba?, basta un, npanaginipan q xe xa, as in totally sobrang ganda nung araw q the next day dahil lang sknya, alithough hindi xa lagi ngrreply sken, ok lang, ganun talaga e, love is unfair ika nga nila, hahan22wa lang tlaga q, kahit na ganun xa sa lahat ng friends nya, iba pa rin ung dating nya sken, ayaw q xa mahalin xe nga i treat her as a bestfriend, pero hindi q nmn mapigilan ang aking damdamin, wow ah!, haha gets nyo na un!, andame q din binago sa sarili q just because of her, she can easily make me smile, tingin pa lang at ngiti nya, alam na!, haha basta if ever man na mabigyan aq ng pagkakayaon, mgtatapat na aq sknya, nahuli pa nga nya aq one time, xe may cnend xa na link na secret love chuva, i nilagay q xa dun, kya aun, nalaman pa nya, ng-alibi nlng aq, haha basta para syo ROSE, i can make it to th end!!, bye!! 

my God, i actually said to her, i don't know whats my next move, but she told me that she still have problems and feelings for the guy, but for me it's ok, i don't really have the right to get jealous or mad, it's her decision. in fact, we just met, how will she fall for me in that short period of time, and we are still getting to know each other, and i know that she's not yet ready to enter into another relationship, haay, talo na nmn, i've been in this situation many times, but still i don't know what to do, i always think that i can do it without my friends helping me. but of course, no man is an island, that's why i've been talking and asking help from the people around me. i've noticed something, this blog contains nonsense! Ha! i don't care, my life is nonsense, i've been acting weird lately, when i'm with my friends, i'm just silent, and then all of a sudden i just smile, i don't know why, maybe because of her, she always makes me smile. one thing is for sure, my feelings for her wont change a bit! i just want her to know that i care for her and i respect her,(am i annoying?, i think i'm being redundant), i really like her, that's it, maybe this wraps things up, thanks my friends!

waahh!, grabe na ito, as in sobrang grabe, haha i just met her a couple of weeks ago, and i found myself falling for her, i know its too early to say this, but this is what i'm feeling right now, no words can tell how much this feeling is bringing happiness to my life right now, what i'm sure is, i know that i will love her as long as my heart is beating, sounds corny but i love to say it, haha we've been texting a week from now, and i can feel that within that short period of time, i care and i'm falling madly in live with her, i don't know whats happening to me, but still, i want to pursue this feeling, even though i cant tell her about this feelings yet, but the time will come when i can face her and tell how much i care and how much i like her, though were in different race, i still want to hug her, i still want to see her cute face and her lovely smiles, some say that shes not worth for me, some say that i will just cry for her, I DON'T CARE!! as long as i have this feelings, i don't care what people say, i hope people can understand me, and i know you cant please all the people in my surroundings, but at least, i can make them understand the feelings that i have for this girl, she's a brick and i'm drowning slowly, i don't want to feel sorry for myself if i will not do this, thats why i'm doing it right now, oh i'm sorry, i forgot to introduce her to you people, i will not say her name, but here is how she looks like, shes cute, nice smile and beautiful, thats how i see her, haha don't protest anymore, "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" hahaha well, that's it for today, till next time! peace out! God bless!!!

hmm, what can i say, i think that in the next few weeks, i'm gonna have a work hopefully, so i think i'm gonna be busy at that time, oh well, that's life, i just have to face this. Uhmm, what else, for me, this will be my turning point in my life, coz, i think that through this, i may know more about my weekness, my limitations and everything. So i'm looking forward in having a job. Just help me pray to get this job, this will also allow me to help my family in putting money inside the house, thank you guys!!